Russell David England

Time is flying by, it is already August.  Dan, Felicia, Peyton and I went to the island in July.  W had not been there since the last time we all went.  We had a really good time.  Peyton's first.... she loved it.

 

We miss you baby......I love you...Moma

It is July, 2010.  Time is flying by Russ.  You have been gone from us 3 years

now.  It is hard to believe.

 

Daniel, Felicia, Peyton and I are going down to the island next week.  It  will

be the first time since we were all there.  I will be sad that you are not there,

but we will feel you I know.  I love you darling and miss you terribly.  Mom

Russell-Merry Christmas- Mom is having a great Christmas
with Daniel, Felicia and your beautiful niece Peyton.  You
would have loved seeing her big blue eyes light up when
she saw her toys under the tree.  The only thing that could            make this day any better would be to have you here with us.We feel you here with us watching.  Miss you with all my heart baby.

I miss his heart.  I routinely called him "Russel Russel the Love Muscle."  Giving affection and sharing his loving heart seemed to be what sustained him.  His conversations with me always began and ended with joy, even if he was down about school or "lopping off the old mop." :)  I think his ability to love is insatiable, and it's comforting to know that all of us who’ve come to know him, us down here, and them up there, have been blessed to experience such a generous and lovely heart that is Russel’s.

 

The following is an excerpt from an email I sent to Deborah around the time of his birthday in 2007. I think it conveys the dynamics that was Russ’ and my friendship, and how I appreciate nature and Russ as one—thinking about and appreciating one of them always evokes warm thoughts of the other.

 

“Today was one of those days where the sun is out, but not beating, rather more of a somber shine.  There weren't a lot of clouds out, but the feeling of the air was gray, colorless, and without warmth.  Birds were not singing, nor were the flowers dancing. 

 

But perhaps it is this very arrangement that prompts and encourages the wind--the chance, finally, to be praised and thoroughly enjoyed without competition from the sun and rain.  The chance for the wind to be appreciated for simply being the wind, not for the brief relief it can provide from the sun’s scorching heat, or that it drives the thunderhead more quickly through.  But rather, to encourage us to be genuine, and retreat to our porch swings and wicker chairs and allow our thoughts and stray hairs to become unanchored and upswept. 

 

And it was on days exactly like this one that Russell and I shared a love for—being outside and simply being.  I would take my phone on hikes simply to call him and describe the scenery and delight.  More than once I would pull out my phone to dial and my phone would begin to ring with his call.  We loved the thought of days like this.  We even loved just talking about what we would do when days like this finally did slip into our laps…going on a run in the crisp morning, reading a book on the porch, walking along a tree-lined trail with the delicious heavy smells of wet moss and feeling protected by the ginkgos and cedars.  For me, feeling beautiful and feminine standing beneath a tricolored beech tree; for him, hiking and being the “mountain man” he claimed with a grin that he was.” 

Just visiting and ahving some laughs and some tears. Looking at all the pictures and thinkin.........Miss you..................

I really cant get over the fact youve been gone over a year now. Sometimes I pass someone in a store or driving on the street and do a double take because they look like you. But noone could ever be the man you were. Never having a bad word to say about anyone, always smiling that beautiful smile and greeting everyone with a big hug! You always took the time to stop and talk, no matter where you were or if you were in a hurry. The last time we spoke it was just a few days before you passed. I was grocery shopping in Walmart and you walked passed the aisle I was in. And being you, you backed up and came to talk :-) Wearing your blue and grey toboggan, as always lol. Im so grateful I got to see you before you were called away. You touched so many lives in so many ways and I know you are watching those you loved and who loved you, everyday from a very special place. My heart goes out to your family. Being a mother myself I could never begin to imagine the hurt,sorry and even anger someone like you could be taken away. But as it is said, HE only takes the BEST!!! And HE has the best  by HIS side forever. I love and miss you Russ and someday we shall meet again!  Love and Faith.. Delitha

It has been 3 months and not a day goes by that I do not think of you. There are so many memories of all of us together that I will never forget. Even though I get sad when I think of you being gone, I will never forget your BIG smile and loving heart! You are one of a kind and will be remembered forever! I love you Russ and always will!

Well it’s been a while since I have came to this web site. It is so very hard for me to come here and look around. I just sit here and think about the times that me and Russ spent together and I also think of  the times that we didn’t.I also think of the times that I will never get to spend with Russ. I am deeply saddened. I have an empty space inside of me.

It is July the 20th, a little over 10 weeks ago, since you have left us.  Time stopped for me and it seems to drag slowly by.  I miss you so.  I have began to call some of your friends.  It has taken awhile.  You had so many friends Russell.  You were so unconditional with your love and caring for people.  I hope that I had a influence with that one, although maybe that and trying to live and love like Jesus.  Well Russell your love was the best a mother could ask.  As you touched my life as your mother,  you touched so many more people ................. I love you.........Moma

Thank you Jason

I find myself coming here more and more often, and each time I think it makes my heart hurt for you just a little more.  I know this seems impossible, but everything happens for a reason. My mother still suffers the loss of my little brother every day, but she takes it one step at a time. If ever any of you need to talk, we are here.  I love all of you and would walk through fire for anyone in your family.  I am so sorry again for all that all of you are going through, and just wish that I could help. 

 

                                                   Jason W.